Aftermath
by Azaelia Took
Summary: A series of character studies surrounding the Prank. Four people react to the same thing in very different ways.
1. Chapter 1: Peter

Peter is scared. At 16, he knows better than to admit it to anyone, but he is, all the same.

At the beginning, back all those years ago, he'd had a nervous little voice in the back of his head, one that whispered that perhaps this prank wasn't such a good idea, that detention wasn't desirable, that he didn't want his record marred by whatever the latest caper might be. Need of friendship, however, as it so often does, trumped fear. After a few incidents, he'd learned that detention wasn't so bad, and with any of his friends it was even fun. He learned not to mind, not to be afraid. For the friends who did everything together, detention was just another entry in a long list of group activities.

Slowly, that voice shut down and shut up. It's been years since Peter heard its last pathetic squeakings.

He wishes he'd heeded them, now. When it whispered, "These things can get out of hand," he'd had no idea how right it was. When it said, "stop now, while you still have the chance," he'd kicked it into a forgotten corner and joined his friends. And now it's too late.

Peter knows what to do when he's scared. He surrounds himself with those who are bigger than the fear, those who don't know it. James. Sirius. But now…now, nothing. He hasn't seen James outside of class, it seems, for days, except when he returns from wherever he's been and falls immediately into bed and sleep, without so much as a "Good night!". This new James is scarily distant.

Now Sirius. Sirius is another matter. Sirius isn't safety anymore. Peter doesn't understand. Oh, he knows the _how_ of it. It's the _why_ that stumps him. He doesn't pretend to know much about friendship, or about anything, really, but he does know that friends simply do not do _that_.

Remus has been used as a weapon. Peter shudders involuntarily. What happens if someday Peter becomes a cog in the machinations of fate as determined by one S. Black? He doesn't like the thought.

Another thought, even less likable than the first, sneaks in. Much as he may be frightened by Sirius' so-called _prank_, he knows, deep down, that he's still too afraid to distance himself.

Without his friends, he is nothing. That is, perhaps, the scariest thought of all.


	2. Chapter 2: James

James spends a lot of time flying, these days.

Out on the Quidditch pitch, life is simpler and balance comes naturally. All that matters is the wind in his ears, the perfecting of his technique. The cool air makes him feel different than he has on the ground for what feels like a grey, lonely eternity. It makes him feel alive.

Off the pitch, nothing makes sense. His whole world changed so much in one night that it's hardly recognizable now. Classes are silent: even the other students and professors seem to have caught the mood, and the tension is difficult to bear. The silence is brittle, as if one word spoken would shatter the world.

The Tower is worse still. There, the silence takes on an icy quality, and the air almost hums with danger. James doesn't spend much time there anymore. Instead, he makes a brief appearance there right after class to grab his broom. After dark, he hides in the library or the toilet until he's sure his friends—he can't stop thinking of them like that, regardless of the strain—are asleep, and then puts on the cloak and tiptoes back in and up the stairs to tumble into bed and the gentle release of sleep.

His friends are silent, too: somber strangers that he once laughed with.

James knows he is silent, too. He thinks that perhaps he can speak for all of them when he knows his silence is of the _shocked_ variety. He would readily admit to being all in favor of the occasional (regular, even) Snape-taunting. _Git_, he thinks idly, then surprises himself by regretting it. He'd also willingly admit to various pranks, booby-traps, dancing suits of armor, and the like.

…But this? This _thing_, this abuse of the word "prank"? It's more than Snape-taunting. It's more than a prank. It's bigger than just a game. This is life and death laid bare in harsh relief.

James doubts, now. He wonders about all the mocking over the years. Was it really as harmless as he'd thought? Suddenly, Severus' greasy hair and clear fascination with the Dark Arts…and his long-ago friendship with Evans—_Lily_, James corrects himself—don't seem quite worth all the years of mockery. And even if they were, the scale would be tipped by this whole nightmare. The realization has hit him like a ton of bricks: he's the one who is the git. His victim was nothing but a human being.

Sometimes, James feels like a stranger in his own body. He barely recognizes himself anymore.

He knows his father would tell him that growing up isn't easy…but he's pretty sure this isn't what it's supposed to be all about.


End file.
